Swimming

Anyone who really knows me knows that the one thing I love most about summer is the water. Lake water, ocean water...it doesn't matter as long as it can be used to immerse my body in, I love it. I've been swimming for as long as I can remember. In fact, I don't ever remember NOT swimming over my head. I love the way the water feels on my skin. I love how I feel refreshed after taking a dip. I love to lounge on a float in the water for hours at a time.

I think part of the reason water is so important to me is that it was the one activity that my family did that seemed normal to me. There was no yelling, no hitting, no control issues, no struggles...we were a family at the beach or pond or in their pool. Most of the time we got along. My brothers and I buried each other in sand, made forts, played catch. It was, much like music was, a respite for me. I could leave the suicidal mom, the angry dad, the delinquent brothers, and the feelings of inadequacies and leave them behind for that short moment in time.

Water is a part of me. It's a part of who I am. It's one of the activities that I love the most...being in the water. To understand and to accept me, you really have to understand that it's something I really love. Take it away from me...and it's like taking music out of my life. I need it. I want it. I couldn't exist in a world where being in the water wasn't allowed.

I guess the point is that we all have some hard limits in our lives. I like my summer activities to surround water. It's why we live in the house we live in. I spend too many months staring longingly at the lake yearning for swimming season. I have a few short months to enjoy it. So, if you're trying to reach me....and I'm not around....look in the lake.