Hidden

 I saw this painting at an art show at the Abrahadbra Oasis almost two years ago...and was immediately drawn to it.  So, I purchased it...and am considering making some of it my next tattoo.

What do I see?  I see a woman who's been locked up emotionally.  Every thing in her life bottled up, by her own design or by others, it matters not.  All that matters is that it's been bottled up like a 2 liter of Coke with a package of Mento's dropped in and the cap placed back on.  Hidden....festering...bubbling...until she can't take it anymore and she explodes. Her hopes, dreams, fantasies, fears, joys, everything comes exploding out of her....the oxygen igniting it all, increasing the flames of truth, reality, feeling until it consumes everything around her. 

What do I see?  I see me.  I see the young girl that learned early on to build her walls so high that no one can climb them.  I see the young woman she became who put her needs, wants, desires aside for those important to her.  Cared for them, helped them achieve their wants, needs, and desires to the best of her ability....above her own.  I see the woman on the brink of entering "Middle Age."  Her "job" as mother, nurturer, educator is rapidly changing.  Her children's no longer view her as the center of her world...but now an important cornerstone. 

I see a woman who still, for the most part, feels hidden.  Hiding from the world and being hidden from the world by others.  I see a woman struggling to let herself out...to feel, want, need, desire.  I see a woman who is tired of being hidden.  I don't want to be hidden anymore.  I want to be happy with who I am...and I want those around me to be happy that I'm a part of their life, in every capacity...I want them to be proud of me.  I want to stop hiding...and I want to stop being hidden.

Big changes are coming in my life...now seems to be a good time to stop hiding.