Days 7-9 A Fish (Oil) Tale

Ok, so day 7 I went to the gym...day 8...I didn't...and day 9 (today) I did. Boy, do I have a story for you today, dear reader. And it's all about the effects of fish oil. I was instructed in May to start taking fish oil because of my cholesterol levels...I did take it for awhile, but there was one side effect that I just didn't care for....flatulence! Everyone knows that a lady NEVER toots. So, I stopped taking it.

Along with changing my eating habits and exercising, I decided that I would also do the things that I am supposed to do: take my vitamins, a digestive enzyme (thanks John!) and take my fish oil. Anyone who has ever taken (or is taking) fish oils knows that there are a few undesirable side effects. The only one I feel somewhat comfortable talking about is the flatulence. Over the past few days I've noticed that my backside has a mind of it's own....and at some of the most inconvenient times it tries to have a discussion with me: conference calls, team meetings, walking in the grocery store.....and lately, working out at the gym!

This morning began like any other morning....I got to the gym, stepped upon the treadmill and set it to go. About ten minutes into my walk...my butt starts trying to talk to me again. I was not alone in the women's room this morning...so imagine me walking on the treadmill, clenching my cheeks (and not the ones on my face), walking at a brisk pace. (Bright side, I bet my glutes got a good workout!) This maneuver only lasted about a minute when my butt revolted! With each step, air leaked out. All I could envision was a skit that Larry the Cable Guy did on his grandmother with her walking farts! Luckily, the fans were on and the equipment that we were using were loud. I'm not sure if there was a stench associated with the noise (in my experience the last few days, there was) and thankfully there was no one behind me!

Still, images of passed out people in workout attire (circa Olivia Newton John's "Physical" video) ran rampant through my mind. I had the biggest grin while continuing my treadmill routine. The poor older woman sharing space with me must have wondered. Or maybe, the machines and fans weren't as loud as I thought they were and she knew?

My "noisy" backside continued during my weight workout...my butt firmly pressed into the seats to avoid any notification that my body was revolting on me. Until......the last machine......the ab cruncher machine......last set of 15. The room has grown to three other people besides me. My backside seemed to have calmed down a bit. I got up, got the disinfectant, sprayed the machined and as I wiped it down...without warning......the loudest fart I have EVER made came out of my body! I swear ALL of the machines stopped, even the fans! The three older women turned, simultaneously, and looked at me. And I sheepishly said "Excuse me.....fish oil." With knowing nods, the activity in the room continued! And I laughed my proverbial ass off in the shower!!!

Bottle of Fish Oil....$9.95. Gym Membership....$29.95 Farting Loudly in an echoy room....PRICELESS!