Recently, at work, I've had the pleasure of feeling backed into a corner. Now, not much different from our four legged friends, when I feel backed into a corner, I tend to "fight back." In an effort to stop the barrage, I uttered a sentence that 1) I didn't mean as it was received and 2) I'll never forget. "XXXX, what do you want me to do, I am sitting here feeling like I can't do my job and I should give my two weeks notice." At that point, my two week's notice was accepted. But the barrage continued....until when asked why I didn't know something inside and out....I replied that during the time that this item was on my plate, I was working nearly 70 hours a week getting 7 high importance items launched....something was bound to fall through the cracks. This particular item...I knew there was someone else that knew it inside and out...we worked as a team...and did a great job!
So, I was sent home to think about if I wanted to "retract" the two weeks notice I never gave. The next morning, prepared to eat crow I felt I didn't deserve, I waited patiently for my VP to come in. He eventually showed up just at the start of our morning team meeting and proceeded to humiliate me in front of our entire team. It appears that my campaigns will be disbursed to the rest of the team and I will "sit with them and train." This was on the ninth month anniversary of my employment there. I was mortified, embarassed and humiliated. Had I resources available, I would have packed my stuff and left at that moment...but I need to be responsible. The humiliation continued throughout the next few hours. I was no longer the "lead Account Manager" on accounts that I have managed, grown and nurtured for nine months! I was to do the work, but others would make the decisions. And everyone knows about this...my coworkers are not stupid.
Knowing that I need this job, knowing that I like what I'm doing...and with the counsel of a great friend (thank you Mid), I decided to approach this as an opportunity to learn more. To take information from my co workers and apply it to what I'm doing. I know I do my job very well...but I also know I'm not perfect. Learning other ways to look at the data, presenting the data, and their processes...will not only help me when I'm struggling...but if I ever become a manager, it gives me a view of a different learning style.
Well, yesterday started...I did my end of week reports, then found out...after I sent them...they needed to be reviewed by the new "Lead AM's." This, however, wasn't communicated to me by my immediate supervisor. It appears that she's not talking to me. Ignoring someone is a sign of a stunted maturity in my opinion...especially if you are that person's manager. What kind of manager ignores their employees? How is that good management? What philosophy does that follow?
Everything happens for a reason....I need to believe that right now. I need to hold onto that. My "two week training period" seems an awful lot like a transition of power, so to speak. I suspect that after the first of the year, I'll be terminated. I don't need to be retrained. In fact, not too long ago, I was told how well I performed when training other people. They are merely setting themselves up so if I leave, their most challenging campaigns/clients will be taken care of. Good business sense maybe, poor people management.
